So many dogs and their walkers move past my window.
Sun and air and open spaces bring people out of their controlled existence.
The trees listen to their laments.
The snow offers a blanket of mystery as we wait and wonder and hope. Cry and call out for answers.
Still, I experience an open positivity from many Community of Faith folks.
I know there is grief and angst and worry and loneliness. But from that remains a tap streaming out living water as we put our faith and all that we are into the hands of our Beloved.
Everyone I see looking out from downtown window is a part of the Jesus Community I believe in.
Each created in love.
Each filled with light and darkness.
Each forgivable and capable of forgiving.
As Dr. King reminds us, “Love is the only force capable of turning an enemy into a friend.”
I have to remind myself of this everyday.
Our species does frighteningly disturbing things!
And even when I am challenged to love through this, I know there is something/someone that is not.
I do not know where I would be without this.
Still following the star
The importance of each day transists into each moment.
The significance of the future is now.
Heart’s yearn, break, overflow and wait for sleep.
For some the only respite in the madness that infiltrates these days.
I know the spots are dark.
That suffering abounds.
It is different but it is not new.
Perhaps for the first time the entire world is together. No-one remains unimpacted.
Sharing-Stories. Fear. Concern. Vision. Hope. Loneliness. Dreams, of the potential for us to evolve out from our collective experience and awake into our wonder:
God’s light, with all creatures-beloved and held so close, if you pay attention, really really wait for it- you can feel it.
God’s breath breathing truth and love and acceptance and mercy and justice and belonging into us.
For us. To help us catch ourselves and become all God believes, knows and trusts we are.
The image of eternity.
Each a soul without end.
Stopping here are earth to be a part of a cosmological experience-beyond our comprehension.
We are each here for this time.
To add to give to take to be to accept to become
Our earthly destiny.
Uniquely shared with all life.
I know at our core we are love.
Something we are still defining but is a place of welcome, imagination and includes everything.
The immensity of our struggle is the indication of our transformation.
Every time this happens, we all grow a little more
Epiphany. Celestial presence
The moon is one of the most beautiful celestial bodies in the night sky.
On our twilight walk, puppies and me, we watch her rise from the edge of the eastern horizon, full- bodied, granting gleaming light to our steps.
Listening trees and Christmas light splendour add more magic to our winsome stroll through urban Peterborough.
An in-between time.
Thin and veil like.
Day to dusk – evening to night.
In these brief moments, my spirit is filled with crisp winter cold that brings wanting warmth to an awakening heart.
Awakening to what, that is not clear.
But there is an awakening and I am hopeful more of us are experiencing it than not.
It is new. Still being born. Entering slowly. Challenging. Inviting. Weaving us together with thick rope and rainbow ribbon.
And oh what a weaving!
Our closeness to one another is palpable.
Our trajectory toward enlightenment on course.
It may be hard to see through the mist of chaos and intolerance, but it is there.
Just push away the clouds and look for the star.
It will guide you into your new life. Your new hope. Your new being.
Our new world.
Waiting for us to join the journey.
I look forward to seeing you there.
2 more sleeps
The clouds covered most of the sky, but for a brief moment a sliver of clear gave sight to the celestial body piercing the night with wonder.
The world is tumbling over itself trying to stop the raging virus.
Saturn and Jupiter drift without notice of any of this, into each other’s arms.
Another astonishing event for us to take notice of.
Once again we are invited to look beyond ourselves and see with greater clarity and wider vision-a light both intimate and beyond.
Just as the light of God stirs us toward wakefulness, being separated, experiencing despair, knowing suffering and feeling afraid-shake us awake.
And here we begin to see that which has been other but is actually one with us.
There is no other, there is only us and all that we can each see, hear, touch, taste, experience and imagine.
Raging viruses. Great conjunctions. In-fighting. Global unrest.
None of this compares to what waits behind the stable door.
Still. Newly arrived. Sacred. Vulnerable. Awake. Everything possible.
Nothing can truly change this.
This is carved into our hearts.
We are each this.
We are all this.
Together as Christ-light beings we can live lives beyond hate and injustice.
We can embrace and experience transcendent love when we open the stable door and see ourselves, safe in a manger, surrounded by knowns and unknowns, unfettered and newly awake.
This Christmas open the door and become all that Creating God believes you are.
December 16, 2020
Music is the voice of God
God’s voice resonating through us.
It invites into another dimension of being.
Drum-beats. Chimes. Strings. Voice. Wind. Keys.
A symphony of invocation into other-worldly-ness.
Losing ourselves in music is a pathway to being found.
Messages of love are holy lyrics.
Our heart sounds add melody.
Our bodies are moved into rhythmic dance.
Our soul’s envelope ancient song.
Shared. Understood. Universal.
A Community of Faith where body, mind & soul are nourished through music in all its wonderment, magic and manifestations.
It heals. Relieves pain. Lessens inflammation. Encourages cell rejuvenation.
Widens the mind and centers us in our symbiosis with all beingness.
Music frees us.
And for many, it saves us from our brokenness.
December 9, 2020
Finding Joy under the snow
Coming into joy. Shifting out from despair and finding feelings yet defined.
Is it joy?
It feels vibrant, sensory, acute, soft, hopeful.
Perhaps it is joy.
What a blessing.
To find a piece of joy bearing fruit when so many trees are quaking with fear.
Like so many others, I have known death and heart-ache over this past year.
Pieces of me are fractured.
And yet that which remains still seeks joy and spirit-song through longing and connection.
There is a tenacity to the human spirit that continues to astound.
This time of re-meeting ourselves.
Revisioning our lives.
Reclaiming our Christ light energy is that star in the sky reminder of our deepest and most holy truth.
A truth we are committed to pursuing and living out.
Our promise to God to always keep seeking.
Always keep loving.
Always keep listening and to remember that each of our fragile and impermanent beings belongs to a Source we have yet to fully comprehend.
And still, in spite of or perhaps because of all our spiritual philosophy, dawn, no matter how to comes, comes with the promise of something new.
Thank-you Creating Spirit for always being our present.
In the Round. December 2.
In the Round. November 25
Always beckoning Advent
Squirrel and bunny prints press our snow laden path as we walk
our morning urban journey.
The hidden sun mutes the sky and everything appears vintage
with a subtle wash of colour.
Perfect day for photo taking.
Hints of how our balanced perspective looks when we wrap all our feelings up into one still.
Beautiful. Austere. Surreal. Quietly inviting.
Welcoming. Waiting. Wondering. Wandering.
A time of imagination and profound introspection.
An invitation to reclaim, reset, rethink, reaffirm.
To see a little differently than the past year.
To awaken a little wider, a little softer, a little more hopeful.
A little more in tuned to the rhythms of earth and love and each other.
Come, come, Emmanuel. Come Emmanuel.
Let us sigh into this time of anything is possible and
uncover the greatest mystery of all.
In the round. November 18
Back to now
Remembering New Brunswick winter morning.
Cold nose alerts wood furnace is hungry.
Paper and kindling spark to life night-time embers.
Sigh. Back to blankets and still dreaming kitties and pups
taking up most of the space on my bed.
My heart sighs deep in this memory.
It carries me.
And I feel God here.
Imagining where I have been. Living where I am.
Seeing the possibilities ahead.
Here I find my ground.
Everything in my head speaks to my heart
and together they are witness to a long life filled with adventure,
heart break, miracles, dark night sorrow and love beyond imagining.
In this time without an end date, I remember and give thanks.
Raw beyond comprehension thanks.
I am not freed from my concern or anxiety, but I am accompanied in it.
There is something to feeling not entirely alone.
And even I, who prefer solitude, appreciate deeply, simply knowing,
I am a part of a bigger mystery that continues to unfold before my very eyes.
New memory: Soft snow big and whispering, falls between cracks of sun outside my city window.
In the round. November 11
My heart is both fixed and flexible.
Open and determined.
An ever-moving pattern that invites imagination.
My being flows with its commitment to the vulnerable.
I struggle and fail, everyday in this.
I lose sight. Become overwhelmed. Give into the world’s egoic mindset that does not invite or respond from a compassionate or ethical place.
But my commitment remains.
And I forgive myself and all of us for falling short of deep care and conscious awareness that is our potential as ever evolving beings moving toward collective enlightenment with quiet and often invisible intentionality.
Creating safe places. Listening to one another with intent and respect. Hearing our Mother Earth speak to us out from her suffering and her celebration and everything quietly dancing in between.
Our movement toward inclusivity of all life.
If we want to find our collective truth we need to discover our individual soul story. Our heart’s desire. Why we are here. And ultimately our belonging. Although these things already naturally and inherently exist, no longer do we connect easily or intentionally to our own story and as a result, our global story.
I believe we want to live justice-filled lives.
Lives in balance with body mind and spirit.
Provide safe spaces for the vulnerable.
Believe in the interconnection of all life on Earth.
But we are lost and our disconnection from the natural world has disabled us from finding our way.
We need help. We need guidance. We need to loom ourselves into the Great Spirit’s love for everything.
As a collective, and often as individuals.
Help in the form of;
Forgiveness toward those who hurt us most.
Acceptance of even the most feared and cruel.
We need lives that are not black or white.
One way or another, we need living spaces that river and bend and give and support and always find their way home.
In the Round, November 4.
When my body ends its stay on earth and only my soul remains, I imagine participating in the realization that our planet grew even beyond the altruism, authenticity and humility of the Star Trek multi-verse.
Food security. Racism. Consumerism. Inequality. Ignorance and Indifference aside, I still believe in the ever-evolving relationship with the yet known mystery that is our soul-story-humanity.
Benevolent. Selfless. Creative. Hope-filled. Dynamic. Kind. Child-like. Inclusive.
Can we move past intentional suffering?
Keep balance but not subject ourselves, each other and all beings on earth to suffering that could be prevented?
Even in a life, any life, where no intentional suffering exists that being/life-form will still suffer.
Birth as we know it is painful, as is:
And none of these need be intentional.
Life hurts. For us to have thought otherwise-been told otherwise, was/is a lie.
There is nothing perfect about our world. There isn’t meant to be.
Everything has an edge.
But there is a synchronistic pattern that moves all things into a dance.
Molecules that exist on Earth have been found in other star systems.
In a world without intentional suffering, where we are free to grow and be and evolve in a symbiotic environment that is conscious, death’s truth begins to unfold with greater clarity and less fear.
However we leave this life, we know we have simply stepped somewhere else.
Today, I don’t mind so much learning to dance somewhere new.
In the round. October 28th
Time away now back from study and contemplation, watching white trails of new frost greet the day.
Winter is coming. (Thank-you Jon Snow…)
It always is.
But also, it is always going.
It is brief. A time of rest and blanket for us and the earth. Nourishment for the planet and our souls. But we need not get stuck here. The world sometimes sticks to us in ways that prevent joy. Prevent hope, our inherent companion, from reminding us of our true journey.
To prepare for the coming season and in the wake of an often consuming energy of what is not working or going well in life and in the world, I made a list. To both ease my heart and remind me of what is genuinely, lovingly, creatively happening – all around us.
We may be frightened and lost, sad and restless, but we have found remarkable things during our time of forced seclusion and waiting for our world to find its true self.
Things of hope and renewal.
Things to remind us we are seekers and we want to be transformed.
People are learning new languages
Meditating more. Praying longer
Gardening, growing things, harvesting
Talking with old friends-family members they have been disconnected from
More art is being creating
We are thinking outside the box
Finding thoughtful presence in a moment
Watching a chickadee crack open a sunflower seed
Wearing more comfortable clothing
Being respectful of other’s space
Smiling behind masks
Nodding. Bowing. Offering signs of peace and love with our hands and fingers
Taking longer walks
Making kimchi and bread and mother starter and fermenting things
We are learning more about and respecting technology
We play together through online gaming
We feel virtual love
We are connecting more intentionally to people and environments throughout the globe
Experiencing an enhanced awakening to climate justice
We have greater appreciation for our homes
We are being challenged to be more inclusive
We are asking more questions
We are seeing, recognizing and responding to injustice and cruelty
We are starting to wake-up
I live in liminal space. In between.
And this threshold offers possibility beyond imagination.
It is hard and painful, but it is our way to each other, to everything. To realize:
October 14 – In the Round
I am not the same minister I was when I first took on this position back in March.
Neither am I the same person.
It was winter.
A new beginning in a new town.
And then everyone went inside.
And so did I.
My home is now different too.
Appreciation for its existence deepens.
Refuge. Shelter. Womb.
From here I awaken.
I am finding my inner monk and this is where my heart resides.
In balance, giving-ness, reciprocity and equanimity.
Desert solitude and small-town healing ministry invite me into something both ancient and embryonic.
My Jesus voice is become clearer-but more often then not, it hides.
My heart is widening and breaking.
I am grateful and reluctant.
It is now apparent there is no going back.
From here I begin another journey.
It is a deep still forest, thick and ominous at times.
And then, well-trodden and inviting.
Everything-everyone thus far has encouraged this path.
For all of that and for all of you, I give thanks.
October 7, 2020 – In the Round
Autumn beckons sensory enticement as red-orange-yellow
embrace the visual senses.
Slow falling leaves pass by with whispers and land as
creaturely paws and feet crunch through.
New chill air shivers and comforts as fire pit circles mesmerize
and big woolly blankets embrace.
Magic. Love magic. God magic. Surprising. Real. Transforming.
Life as we have known it through spring and summer song is
leaving, departing dying.
New life is already on its way.
So quietly and in secret, we can only imagine.
And we must imagine.
Widen our mind activity into new thought and creative insight born from inspiration and the intentional inclusion of the impossible and possible.
It is imagination spurred on by the transforming season that invites us into
outside the box thinking.
We need this.
As a global collective.
To save our earth, ourselves, each other and the unknown future waiting for our little ones.
Rise out of the familiar.
Realize a deeper truth.
A oneness of connectivity that includes everything.
We must stop leaving things outside the door through judgement and prejudice and ignorance.
To be free to fully love God and all that God loves we must let go of everything that separates us from one another.
Stuff. Morality. Victorian work ethics. Outdated politics. Hierarchies. Class. Inequity. Racializing. Stigma. Hate. Busyness. Perfection. Misogyny. Dominance. Cruelty. Indifference. Scapegoating. Judgement. Self-loathing.
We have been created to know better and do right by all life.
If we continue to turn our backs on others and all of earth’s kin,
we turn our backs on God.
And we need God, as surely as we need air, water, sustenance and sleep.
Our true companion.
September 30, 2020
The Lorica of St. Patrick (The Deer`s Cry)
I arise to-day:
vast might, invocation of the Trinity,—
belief in a Threeness
confession of Oneness
meeting in the Creator. . . .
I arise to-day:
might of Heaven
brightness of Sun
whiteness of Snow
splendour of Fire
speed of Light
swiftness of Wind
depth of Sea
stability of Earth
firmness of Rock.
I arise to-day:
Might of God for my piloting
Wisdom of God for my guidance
Eye of God for my foresight
Ear of God for my hearing
Word of God for my utterance
Hand of God for my guardianship
Path of God for my precedence
Shield of God for my protection
Host of God for my salvation . . .
Christ with me, Christ before me,
Christ behind me, Christ in me,
Christ under me, Christ over me,
Christ to right of me, Christ to left of me,
Christ in lying down, Christ in sitting, Christ in rising up
Christ in the heart of every person, who may think of me!
Christ in the mouth of every one, who may speak to me!
Christ in every eye, which may look on me!
Christ in every ear, which may hear me!
I arise to-day:
vast might, invocation of the Trinity
belief in a Threeness
confession of Oneness
meeting in the Creator.